Why Your Mess Is Actually Your Message

I want to start our conversation today by painting a picture for you. Right now, in the moments I’m typing this post, I am a complete mess. No, really.

I’ve been crying. A lot. I’ve had more pieces of Dove Milk Chocolate than I would care to confess to in one night. I’m still wearing the blouse I wore to work but I’m also wearing the leggings I’ve been sleeping in for the past three nights. My eyes are puffy and red. I’m sitting in my bed typing all of this to you, waiting for my husband to come and find me in this mess.

Have you ever used that term to describe your life? A MESS? Have you ever just looked at your life and thought is there anything in my life that ISN’T a giant mess right now? I’m pretty sure I do that about ten times a day. I think I keep waiting for the day when life doesn’t feel like a mess and the truth is that just isn’t going to happen. There will always be something in life that just feels messy.


Here’s the really amazing thing about the messes of life: we have a message! All of those tears. All of the anxiety. All of the crazy, chaotic, completely heartbreaking things that happen to us can tell a story. And that story can impact and change lives. So, I want to invite you into my mess right now and share with you how you can turn what feels like a total mess into an impactful message.

So, in the past few weeks I have just been an absolute mess. So much so that I can’t even think of any other word to use except for M-E-S-S. Life has just been throwing some pretty powerful punches lately and I haven’t been so great at blocking them. I’ve gone from bitter and angry one day, to a puddle of tears the next day, and by the end of the week I’m just exhausted and guilt-ridden.

I know I’m not alone in this. If you’re reading this then it’s probably safe to say that you are right in the middle of your own mess. Maybe it’s just one major thing in your life that is overpowering all of the positives. Maybe, if you’re like me, it just feels like life is coming at you from all angles. Either way, you’re likely journeying through your own messy life right now and I have a few things I want you to know today to encourage you to seek the message that can come from your mess.

First, there is purpose in absolutely everything that you are facing right now. Even the things that seem completely pointless or unbelievably painful…even if you never know what that purpose is in this life…just know that there is still a purpose and there is still good (no matter how small of an amount) that can come out of what you are currently up against. There is so much purpose in the pain — never forget that.

Secondly, your story matters. It does! There is someone out there who NEEDS to hear it. Think of all of the lives that have touched your own. Think of how many stories have helped you press on through the messes of life. What is happening to you, what you’re going through, what you think of as a mess might just change someone’s life. Even if your story feels small or too common or not dramatic enough…it still matters. Even if your story is shocking, messier than anything else you’ve ever heard of….IT. STILL. MATTERS. Do not ever, for one second, think that your hurt, your stress, or your tears are unimportant. What you are experiencing, the story that is being written for you, it is all worth telling.

Thirdly, no one is immune to messes. This life is never going to go how any of us imagine it will. There will always be obstacles, road blocks, heartbreak, disasters. And we all must face our own giants at some point. So that gorgeous girl whose instagram feed tells you has it all together…well it isn’t true. She’s going through a mess of her own. All the more reason to share your message — because you can be one of the few who speaks up about their mess and uses it to encourage others.

Lastly, and perhaps most importantly, your mess is often your most impactful message. Just think for a moment — have you ever been impacted by perfection? Has your life every benefited from hearing someone’s perfect story and seeing their perfect life? Yeah…me either! That’s because perfection doesn’t encourage us — it just gives us something to strive toward (which is completely unrealistic). But, how many stories of tragedy, heartbreak, or even mundane struggles of life have lifted you up in some way? Messes are so often where we find true beauty because we are able to see examples of grace, mercy, redemption, and growth.

I’m going to let you in on a little bit of what my mess has been lately….

When I started this blog, when I began building this community, I was prepared for attacks. I knew that if this was what God called me to then I would face attacks from the enemy if I decided to go for it. What I wasn’t prepared for was attacks in every other part of my life except for the blog. From mental health, stress levels, navigating marriage, and many other things, I have felt completely attacked lately. Which leads me to feeling like such a mess because everything is so out of my control.

This mess has been taking up so much of my energy lately and I was starting to feel defeated when I realized something….

These messes that I’ve been perceiving as attacks are actually really amazing opportunities for me to create content to share with YOU. That’s right — I finally was able to see beyond my mess and see the message. What I have been seeing as an attack has actually been a blessing in disguise — it’s been inspiration and a chance to connect with you. And that alone is worth the struggle for me.

So, I want you to remember that even if it feels like things are as bad as they could possibly get, you can still find a message in that mess. There is something there that could make all the difference in someone else’s life. Share it in whatever capacity feels right to you. You might just find that your own mess feels a little less lonely along the way.


6 Comments Add yours

  1. Cris says:

    Thanks for sharing… it’s a good reminder that life is full of ups and downs for everyone. Hugs to you as you find your solid footing again!! 🙂

  2. Sherry says:

    Thank you for sharing, I truly appreciated this.

  3. Miss Hued says:

    I hope this is true. I haven’t been a religious person in years, and it’s been hard for me to handle a lot of things in my life. A “mess” is exactly what I call myself, my home, and my plans for the future! I hope that there is purpose in all of it, and that I will truly come out better on the other side. Thank you for your honesty and your faith.

    1. ssweetlyblog says:

      Miss Hued, thank you so much for taking the time to read. I have no doubts that what you feel is a mess has a much greater purpose to inspire or encourage others. You may call yourself a mess but there is one who calls you beautiful & important. I hope things start to feel less “messy” soon. Please reach out to me if there is ever anything I can help you with, even just a friendly conversation. 😊

  4. Stacy Henley says:

    Thank you for being brave enough to share your mess with us. I needed this reminder in my life to deal with my own mess!

    1. ssweetlyblog says:

      I’m so happy it could speak to you, Stacy. We all have the parts of our life than are anything but perfect. I hope you are resting in joy and grace with yourself today!

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