Life Lately: Dates & Motivation

Happy Monday, friend. Per usual, I like to start each week off with a little recap for you and share a few things I’ve learned or have been thinking on often in the past seven days.

Recap

This week was like most of my weeks: hours behind my computer screen just writing away. Honestly though, I love it. I actually remember missing the task of writing papers after I graduated college. I know…I’m a total weirdo.

Aside from tons of writing, my week was also full of little dates with David. You know how much I believe in continuing to date after marriage and I have told you before how David and I like to turn even the smallest task into an opportunity for some intentional time together. But, this week we actually had a real date.

The only catch? We did this in our fave sweat pants.

We have been receiving the Date Night In Boxes for more than six months now and we love that they help us have a new experience together from the comfort of our own home. And the best part? It costs less than a dinner out.

This week we enjoyed learning to use all of our senses when it comes to our relationship. Plus, because we opt-in for the faith discussion guide, we also enjoyed a meaningful conversation about what it means to be faithful. My favorite part? Learning how to give each other legitimate deep tissue massages and laughing at how ticklish David is. I cannot say enough how much these boxes have impacted our marriage. As soon as the next box arrives in the mail we get so excited about setting a day and time to dig in. It gives us something to look forward to together and it keeps us accountable to at least one intentional date night each month.

Want your own Date Night In Box? CLICK HERE to grab the next month’s box.

Sunday night brought on a fun and unexpected date. While going on one of my many organizing rampages in our house, I stumbled across an adult coloring book (remember when these were so popular?!) and a set of colored pencils someone gifted to me years ago. So, I couldn’t resist sitting down to a nice long shading session. And, much to my surprise, David jumped right in and joined me. We snacked on fluffer-nutter blondies and jammed out to all of our favorite Disney tunes. What started out as a typical day of organizing turned into a fun night of reliving our childhoods together and singing along to Aladdin and The Lion King.

Reflection

After so much time spent with David over the weekend, I started to think of all the ways I almost destroyed the possibility of having this life with him. There was a time, more than five years ago now, that I was walking blindly down a path that was leading me farther and farther away from the life God had planned for me.

I was disobedient, self-centered, and stubborn beyond reason. I was dating someone who not only failed to love me but failed to even be kind to me. I was convinced that three years dating was too much to just walk away from and that my future was already decided: this would be my forever. And though I wouldn’t admit it to myself, I was devastated. I think somewhere deep inside I just knew that a life lived pursuing my own plan would make me miserable.

Thankfully, somewhere along the lines I decided enough was enough and I walked away from a relationship that left me depleted and insecure. I started pursuing a relationship with Jesus and found myself finding more and more joy. And eventually that new path led me straight to David. I’m so grateful that I gave up trying to write my own story and handed it over to the real author of life.

I’ve written about this many times with various points and topics in mind. Click any of the links below to learn more about this story:

How One Word Changed My Faith

How I Prayed For My Love Story

Lies About Love: The Lies I Believed While Dating

Relationship Red Flags: How To Recognize Abusive Dating Relationships

Revelation

I discovered something interesting about motivation this week. And that is: I don’t always have it and sometimes I’m spilling over with it. I have these strange spurts of wanting to do a million things in one day (and actually attempting to) or not wanting to do anything at all.

I know I’m not the only one that feels this way. We all have our moments of just not wanting to show up. But, here’s the thing: we have to show up anyway. “Not feeling like it” doesn’t mean we aren’t supposed to be doing it. It just means we simply don’t feel like it. And, for me, that isn’t enough of a reason to avoid doing that which I’ve been called to do.

Even if it is just getting the groceries for the week or knocking out a few loads of laundry, my lack of motivation doesn’t mean that the task has no purpose. There is so much value in these little mundane things that feel like they take up too much of our time. In fact, I’m trying to train myself to be just as excited to clean the upholstery as I am to show up and write for you. Why? Because they both matter. One serves you, my audience. The other serves my family and demonstrates that I’m trying to be a good steward of all that God has given me: even a less than perfect brown couch.

So, I would encourage you to try and do the same as we embark on this new week. On the days you have tons of motivation, take advantage of it! Get everything done that you feel excited to do. But on the days you lack motivation, show up and do it all anyway. I promise, you will feel so much better by the time you lay down to go to sleep. Getting yourself motivated to do a task that feels purposeless can, in some way, give it purpose.

I hope you get everything checked off your to-do list this week, friend. Because it all matters in some way. It’s up to you to learn the value in it all.

-S.

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